On the same weekend that Jon and Kate Gosselin decided they would divorce, my Dad told me that he and his third wife (married 20+ years) are also divorcing. I know many are tired of Jon and Kate but that's not the topic - the topic is divorce and the Lord's opinion of it. I think Malachi 2:16 is very clear. "Hate" is not a contoversial word.
Why would HE hate it? For one - marriage is the model of the church's relationship with Christ. Why else would the Bible refer to the Church as "the bride of Christ" and to Christ as the "bridegroom"? Covenant relationships are very important to the LORD. It's a model of how he feels about us. He would never divorce us!
The second reason - it's lasting effect. I'm attaching below a personal rant that I included in an email message to a friend. It is how the child of divorce (now 3 divorces) feels...
"Pardon my rant about divorce but here's the issue: divorce is a
non-verbal (well, sometimes very verbal) statement that nothing is worth it any
more. The holidays, the vacations, the quiet nights spent watching a great
movie cuddled up in front of the TV - all of that is somehow less important than
the personal space and feelings of the person wanting the divorce. It is
the most selfish expression I can think of. It is a sentence that says "I
never want to _______ with you again". And anything that fills in the
blank applies. I cannot imagine [unnamed person] never wanting to see my daughter
again. Maybe I'm biased because I'm her mom but I could never imagine not
seeing [my friend's children] ever again - and I'm clearly not their mom. It's a
really rude thing to DECIDE to never see someone again.
And - to the effect on the kids. Kids are extremely perceptive.
EXTREMELY!!!! The "mom look" works because they are so perceptive.
They know. And - the worst part of divorce (at least in my 34 years of
life so far) is that it is a ticking time bomb with two triggers - one that
ruins your childhood - and then one that rears its ugly head when you've
established a family of your own. It's a great tool of the enemy that
makes you think "My dad couldn't deal with children and had to leave - is that
going to be me too?" That was the question I said out loud that had my mom rushing to our house to put an end to. And - that was the moment my husband called a counselor. Imagine what that could have done had I not had two loving people who knew what signs were bad!
And - it makes you wonder what was so wrong with you that people couldn't make it work - whether you're the spouse, the kids, the friends, etc. And - the fallout. There's no money anymore - everyone's broke. There's no happy holidays, they're all split. There's no more sane family get togethers. There's her side
and his side. Every graduation, every holiday, every party, every wedding,
every child's birthday, every time a normal family would get together - there's
a black cloud of unhappiness. There's random people acting like parents
who aren't your parents. The Bible mentions that nobody can serve two
masters - what about two fathers (real and step) or two moms? How about
two separate households with different rules? Forget it! There's no
way. As the Bible warns - you will love one and despise the other.
Beware Jon and Kate - the kids will choose because they will have
to.
And - all of these random people in and out and in and out make
you numb to them coming in and numb to them going out."The LORD is not the only person who hates divorce. I hate it too!
